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Hangman's coming gonna find me soon,
So will you hide my watershoes?
They're not good for travel when you run,
They work their best at liquid fun.
I never use soap or any wax debris,
I've seen another pair at amnesty.
Level up front and wide in the back,
I've seen another pair on Panama Jack.

I'm the only one who can use my watershoes,
I'm the only one who can really lose... my watershoes.

I never tie the laces with my fingertips,
I must bend over and use my lips.
It's hard to do I'm not allowed to sit,
Or bend my knees 'cause they'll start to slip.
Put the left on and turn it twice,
My back to the wall, my feet in a vice.
The pain will stop it's only a test,
The emergency broadcast system's best.

I'm the only one who can use my watershoes,
I'm the only one who can really lose... my watershoes.

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Jeffrey Anbinder
The Sexiest Man in Ithaca Radio
jta1@cornell.e